How can i become a more patient parent?

To be honest i am quite stressed out. I have a 9m old baby who i have all the patients in the world for but also have a 6y old %26amp; 4y old that I always seem to be at war with.


How can i make it more peaceful? I encourage them %26amp; praise them and i do really try but i wish i had more fun with them %26amp; i am sure it is not them it's just me.


They break up from school this week %26amp; i am dreaming of a happy christmas, any tips would be really appreciated.How can i become a more patient parent?
Its really tough dont be so hard on yourself. I have pretty much the same mix as you - a 5 1/2 year old boy - he's at scholl full time, a 4 year old daughter - 5 mornings at preschool and a 15 month old baby girl. I feel like I dont have much fun with mine either.





I work 3 days a week but finish in time for school pick up and my childminder brings the girls to school. So 3 days a week they all want me me me from 3.30pm having not seen me all day and thats when I find it the hardest. I have to unpack their bags, make packed lunches, tidy the breakfast things that I never had time to tidy in the morning, make dinner - all whilst sorting out the computer game my son wants to watch, the stickers or whatever my daughter wants to do, carting round the baby as she just crawls round my ankles otherwise or just cries, and changing a nappy or wipng a bottom, getting drinks, bla bla bla.





I dont think just explaining to them that Mumy has things to do and that their whingeing doesnt help will really work because a 6 yr old and 4 yr old will listen but then whinge 5 minutes later and of course a 9 month old wont just cooperate with that.





Trying to get some time for yourself each day would be great - but when ???? If you are like me then by the time they are all in bed and that is a feat in itself - there is still laundry to do and toys to tidy and then you just want to veg in front of the laptop/telly.





I suppose there are two pieces of advice that are useful:





1. Pick your battles


2. Let the housework go


3. Get out somewhere each day





I find 1 and 2 really challenging. I start off tine with the choose your battles and as time goes on I give off more and more about more and more, things reach a peak and I have to have a good old cry, decide I cant keep on like this, choose my battles and start over. Try to ignore the small stuff. If they dont finish their breakfast dont sweat it just giveit back to them later or whatever. On the housework thing dont make the kitchen spotless just leave it and then be silly and dance with them, do sticking with them etc, whatever you can.





Try to get out at one point during each day. I find the fresh air (even if just from house to car) helps , it kills some time of the day (sorry if that seems depressing way to look at it but some days you just want toget through), and gives you a focus. It doesnt have to be for them, just go and buy a pint of milk.





I feel a bit like all I have done is waffled bu I wanted you to know the way you feel is normal. Sorry I havent helped much have I ?! If you find a solution let me know.......How can i become a more patient parent?
What you can try to do is relax. Make sure to take some time to yourself every day. Even if it consists of you staring at the wall for 20 minutes. When you put the baby down for a nap, put the other 2 in their rooms for quite time. Have some yourself.





Take a deep breath before getting upset, if it is something that is not worth getting upset and angry about, step away for a second, take a deep breath and remember what you want out of yourself. Its not easy being patient, I know. I sometimes tell myself, is this really a big deal and worth getting upset over? Then I step back take a deep breath and act calm. Hey I ain't no angel, its not always easy especially when you have 3 kids at home. Find some neat activities that will keep the older ones busy and interested.





Good Luck:)
Kids are most likely to be at war when they are bored.





Kids miss the structure and routine of school when they are not there, it may help to keep to a routine and let them know what is going to happen and when.





A week to view calendar should do the trick then you can show them the structure of the week.





I keep a huge box of stickers, paper, pens, pencils etc and plonk it infront of the kids, keeps them quiet for ages. They get creative and distracted.
Have you tried explaining to your kids? They are old enough to understand that you are tired and aren't feeling patient at the moment. You are not broken. You have three kids and one of them is 9 months old. Of course you are stressed out. Worry less about the housework, delegate the Christmas cooking to someone else and spend some time on the couch eating cookies and reading stories with the kids. If your hubby complains, tell him you have no choice because you are going nuts. Then point out that he probably doesn't want to leave his kids in the care of a crazy woman. It won't hurt anyone if you have cheese on toast for dinner occasionally...
I would like to know how to become more of a patient parent and babysitter as well! Hehe!





Sometimes just letting loose of control is needed in situations as this. It may not be as you expect it to be - it may be worse, but it could jog your 6 and 4 yr old into wondering what's up and perhaps curb their antics.





The only thing I can suggest - calm thyself.
happy pills. stress pills. caffeine. anything that would make you more peppy